Paris Jackson Says Drugs and Alcohol Once Helped Her Feel “Normal”

Paris Jackson is opening up about the deep loneliness she has experienced since childhood and how it may have contributed to her struggles with addiction, depression and anxiety.

The singer-songwriter, 28, discussed her mental health and recovery during an appearance on the On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast on Monday, Aug. 17. She recalled that her life began to feel “heavier” when she was around 8 years old, several years before the death of her father, music icon Michael Jackson.

“I remember being surrounded by love and playing Hot Wheels with my brother, and then going into my room and being alone for a second and having that sinking, empty feeling,” Jackson said.

She described that feeling as a kind of “chronic loneliness” that has followed her throughout her life. She believes it played a role in her struggles with alcoholism, drug addiction, depression and anxiety.

“It’s hard to explain,” she said. “It just sucked.”

Jackson said she eventually turned to drugs and alcohol as a way to escape thoughts and emotions that felt difficult to manage. She described substances as a “Band-Aid” that temporarily helped her feel more in control.

“I feel very deeply,” she explained. “It just made me feel normal, it made me feel more managed.”

Jackson has been open about her history with alcohol and drugs, including cocaine, heroin and opioids such as fentanyl. In January, she marked six years of sobriety from alcohol and heroin.

In an Instagram post celebrating the milestone, Jackson stressed that recovery does not mean life suddenly becomes perfect.

“If you’ve got this s---, or anything of the sort, you’re not alone,” she wrote. “Hang in there and if no one’s told you they love you today, I love you.”

Jackson also spoke about the treatment she has pursued for her mental health. She said she underwent electroconvulsive therapy to treat depression and currently works with a behavioral therapist to manage symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

Although she does not consider herself a spokesperson for sobriety, Jackson said sharing her experience has been an important part of her recovery.

“I by no means want to be a spokesperson for sobriety, but sharing my story is something that has helped me,” she said. “Hearing other people’s stories has helped me, so if I can pay that forward, absolutely [I] will.”

Jackson is also preparing to release her second studio album, Happiest Day of My Life, on Aug. 21. The album follows her 2020 debut, Wilted, and has been described by Jackson as “a collision of sound, experience and emotion.”

Through her music and candid conversations about recovery, Jackson continues to share a more personal side of her life, including the challenges she has faced and the ongoing work involved in staying sober and managing her mental health.